Monday Project #1 - Full Circle

Wow, what a doozy to start with. I've been randomly thinking about what I was going to write in the post and I honestly have no idea where to begin. I guess that's not entirely true. I know where to begin, I'm just not thrilled to go back there.

Before I talk about 2009, I need to talk about the summer of 2000. This was the year of my big "ah-ha" moment when I decided I needed to do something to take control of my life...and my weight. My kids were turning 3 and I was turning 30 (gack!). I was tired, my knees hurt, I couldn't get up and down off the floor to play with the kids, I'd get winded chasing them in the yard, and let's face it...I looked like crap. I had gone on a hiking/camping trip with a bunch of my husband's friends from work. We hiked a couple miles a day (on pretty easy trails) and it kicked my butt. When we got the pictures back, I wanted to cry. I look happy, but I also look huge. This is the most I've ever weighed (aside from when I was pregnant with Thing 1 and Thing 2). 189 lbs.

I decided I couldn't go into my 30's looking and feeling like I did. I joined Weight Watchers and started taking community-ed aerobics classes. After a few months, we bought a family membership to the YMCA and I started doing group exercise classes (step, double-step, kickboxing, strength training classes-you name it). Funny thing-I found out I'm actually pretty coordinated and picked up on the routines quickly. Imagine how my different life could have been if my parents had encouraged sports when I was a kid. (My dad is very obese, over 300 lbs, and has all the health issues to go along with it. My mom died of skin cancer at 42, but was also overweight-15 to 20 lbs.) Exercise and outdoor activities were not really a part of our life. I wish they had been.

One of the questions posed by our wonderful sisters was...What did work? Well, the combination of Weight Watchers and exercising for 45-60 minutes 4-5 times per week REALLY worked. In one year, I lost 50 lbs. I'd managed to get down to 139 lbs and was easily a size 8. Wow! Through generally watching what I ate, going to Weight Watchers every month to weigh-in (I was a lifetime member at this point), and continuing to exercise, I stayed at this weight for about 6 years. This picture was actually taken in August of 2003 - 2 years after hitting my goal. This hiking trip was easy.

Now, we get to the part of the post where I think about what didn't work. Laziness and getting sloppy is what didn't work. Getting wrapped up in my kids lives and activities and not making time for myself (selfish as that sounds) didn't work. Larger portions and less working out didn't work. Reverting to old habits, like snacking in front of the TV at night, didn't work. I think you see where this is going. I feel like my downfall had been building all of 2007 (I'd gained back about 5 lbs-the "danger sign" from a Weight Watchers standpoint), but really solidified in the summer of 2007. We went to St. Lucia to a beautiful Sandal's resort with all the food and booze you could consume. Needless to say, I was on a very slippery slope. I had received my SCUBA certification before we left and I dove every day, but it wasn't enough exercise to combat all the calories. I gained another 5 lbs or so that week. Things have really snowballed since then. I'd managed to put on a total of 25 lbs and was back up to 165. My clothes didn't fit and I was horrified to need to buy some new pants in a size 12. Depressed doesn't even begin to cover it.

I'd had my 2nd "ah-ha" moment. This summer I decided I needed to get back on track. I linked up with the Sisterhood and started counting points again. Only, this time, it didn't work. More specifically, I didn't make it work. I was burned out on points and felt horribly deprived by the limited number of points I was allowed each day. I'd do well for a few days, then I'd fall off the wagon. I was exercising again, too, but definitely not at the level I had in the past. My husband and I were training for a 5K (my 4th, his 1st). We ran it in July 09 and crossed the finish line together, with a time I'm not proud of, but a finish nonetheless. Except this time, the weight was not coming off like it did before. Here I was, turning 39, and weighing 165 lbs. Since joining the sisterhood, I've managed to lose 5 lbs. But I was hoping for so much more.

Turns out hoping you'll lose weight doesn't work either! I've decided to bring my A game. I've been exercising daily since mid-December and have been counting calories using The Daily Plate at livestrong.com. I'm feeling more energized and optimistic. We'll see how the scale responds, but like this challenge says, it's not just about the scale. This is a journey. One I've been on really all my life. I need to be realistic. I am never going to weigh 120 lbs, I'm never going to have a 6-pack (hello-twin skin!). However, I can strive to be fit and be the wife and mother my family deserves.

This is me today. I've really come full-circle. 10 years ago, I embarked on a serious journey to lose weight and get healthy. I've hit some bumps in the road, but I haven't been completely derailed. I've just gotten a little lost, but I'm back on track. I'm ready to head into 2010 (and my 40th birthday this summer) as One Fit Momma. "Fabulous at 40" is my goal.

Re-Think Your Shrink - Week 1

I've never been one to make New Year's resolutions. Not because I won't keep them, but because I think it is crazy to say you are going to make changes in your life, just because it's Jan 1. If you see an area of your life that needs improving-improve it. That's what I've been trying to do for months, I just haven't been very successful yet :)

This is where the sisterhood comes in. I need to be accountable to someone other than myself. I did Weight Watchers years ago and lost 50 lbs. I kept it off for 6 years, but the past 2 years have been rough and I've put 25 back on. Since joining the sisterhood, I've lost 5 of that (a drop in the bucket, really) and I'm hoping to lose at least 10 more. I'm starting this challenge at 161.2, which is up 1.4 from last week. This bouncing around the 160 mark is really pissing me off. I need to get down to at least 157 so my daily water/salt differences won't keep popping me back over 160 and tick me off so much. (I literally fluctuate up to 2 lbs a day based on what I had for dinner the night before-HATE it). Oops, we're not supposed to have any negative talk-my bad!

I love the idea of the "Monday Project". My school does something similar, called "Mission Monday" where students (and staff) are asked to step out of their comfort zones. Things like, sit at a new table at lunch, introduce yourself to a student in another class at recess, stuff like that. I'm very curious to see what our friends at the sisterhood will come up with for the next 7 Mondays.

So, here is my plan:

• I don't think I will follow a specific food plan, but I am going to try to write down what I eat and count points when I can. I'm so burned out on WW that I will start each week really good, but usually give up around day 3 or 4. I'm also going to try to stop the snacking after dinner. (As a side note, I'm getting an iPhone in a couple months-if anyone knows of a good food-logging app, please let me know).
• As for exercise, we just got a Wii for Christmas and I'm 4 days into the EA Sports 30 day challenge. I'm liking it, but I feel like the workouts are too short. I may start doing each day's workout twice when I have time. I also have a gym membership that I really should be using more consistently. I love group exercise classes (spin, step, kickboxing) but haven't been able to go much with my kids' after school schedules. It seems the days that I can go, they don't have a class (or instructor) I like. I need to start making it a priority to have some "me" time each week, even if it is to just get on the treadmill for an hour. I can't exercise outside until about April (too fracking cold and snowy), so I need to use the gym.
• I've joined the 'hood, have a twitter account I never use :), and log my workouts on dailymile. Can't wait to see what we do with dailymile-it's been a great site to track what I do.

I'm really hoping 2010 is the year I get back on track. I'm turning (gasp!) 40 this summer and I want to be 40 and Fabulous, not 40 and Fat. I'm probably never going to see the 130's again, but I'd love to be in the 140's for my 40th. Help me get there, friends!

Shrinkaversary Final Weigh-in

Well, this pretty much sucks. When I started the challenge, I had made it into a new decade: 158.8. Today's weight: 161.0. That is up 2.2 lbs - S**t! But considering how busy I've been the past 2 weeks (no exercise what.so.ever. and eating crap, crap, and more crap) then I'm lucky to have only gained 2 lbs. I did really good on mileage for the first few weeks, but like I said, NOTHING, in the past 2, so by my count on dailymile, I walked 30 miles. I never counted the walking I do all day long at school, so it's probably a little more, but I don't really have a way to track that.

I'm very frustrated and I don't like that feeling.

• I hate that I have to watch every morsel that goes into my mouth.
• I hate that my body seems to retain water like crazy if I've had so much as a couple shakes of salt. Forget about what happens if I go out to eat. Why restaurants have to put so much salt in the food is totally beyond me.
• I hate that one of my coworkers is dropping weight like crazy, but says, "I don't know why I'm losing weight." She was thin to begin with and is beginning to look downright skinny. TOTALLY NOT FAIR.
• I hate that no matter how much weight I lose or how much I exercise, my fat calves will never fit into cute, knee-high boots. (They barely squeezed in when I was down to 140).
• I hate that when I joined the sisterhood this past summer, my weight had ballooned back up over 165, but I've only lost about 5 lbs. I just keep losing and finding the same few pounds. It is beginning to look like I will never see 140, much less my low of 138 a few years ago. My doctor says 150 should be my goal, but even that seems very fat on someone who is only 5'3" on a good hair day.
• Obviously, I'm feeling the need to bitch, moan, and whine. I apologize.

What does this tell me? I need to get my a** in gear-literally. Luckily, I am starting Christmas break in 2 days and I really hope to get to the gym. It is waaaaay too cold now, with snow and ice on the ground and major amts of darkness, for me to even attempt outdoor workouts. I'm a total wimp when it comes to the cold. Why I live in Michigan, I may never know. The only explanation I can think of is that I was born here and this is where my family lives. We are also getting a Wii for Christmas (don't tell my kids) and Santa is bringing me the EA Sports game. I can't wait to start the 30 day challenge. I probably also need to start tracking my food again. Can't wait to see what the girls at the sisterhood have in store for us beginning on the 30th. Bring it on!

True Confessions Monday

We ate at Tony's I-75 in Birch Run, Michigan on Saturday. after my son's Lego Robotics tournament. This place was featured in an episode of Sandwich Paradise on the Travel Channel and has been a Michigan icon for over 30 years. The BLT has a full pound of bacon - 'nuf said.

This is not me eating, but this is what I ordered:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtEzRTBRC_c

I've done absolutely no exercise, except Power Shopping, and most of that has been done with my mouse. My daughter also insisted we make Puppy Chow this weekend (you know, perfectly healthy Crispix cereal, coated in a blend of butter/chocolate/peanut butter, and dredged through powdered sugar). I truly live in fear of the scale - he is going to be quite unkind on Wednesday.

I just learned how to add video to my blog (yah, I'm really techie when you compare me to most of my coworkers, but compared to the rest of y'all, I stink).

Here is some video of my daughter doing her thang:

And here is my son:

Shrink-A-Versary Weigh-in: Week 3

This is going to be brief because I have no real time to blog.

This week: 158.0 (down 1.2 from last week).

Miles this week: 10.5

This next week is going to be rough-I'm fighting a sinus infection and somehow managed to cause a blood vessel in my eye to burst, so I look and feel like complete a** , my dad's 70th b-day is on Friday and we are taking him out for dinner on Saturday (I think I'm having a harder time with him turning 70 than he is), and my kids are busier than usual. I don't know if I'm going to even come close to the 10.5 miles I logged this past week. I'd like to average 10 per week, but it is getting harder with the weather getting crappier.

UGH, stop the ride, I wanna get off......

Virtual 5K

Hey Sisters!
Congrats to everyone who ran this weekend. I did not sign up to participate since I'd been having so many knee and hip issues, but I did manage to get out and walk on Sunday. I finished my 3.1 miles in 45 minutes, which is about 14 1/2 minute miles. Not too shabby, and sadly not much slower than my most recent running pace of about 12 minute miles. I think I've resigned myself to walking from now on, with the occasional short burst of jogging.

Thanks for this new challenge, btw! I'm definitely looking forward to logging the miles. I did another 3.1 today (my usual trail), so I'm on my way to that first button!

Shrink-A-Versary Weigh-In #1

I'm up 0.2 to 159, which is basically like staying the same. Pretty good, since I was up 2 lbs Sunday morning (darn those delicious pickles and olives I ate Saturday night, not to mention the Halloween candy) and it is Parent-Teacher-Conference week this week (anyone who is a teacher knows how "well" we eat during this crazy time).

I know we aren't tracking miles yet, but I have to report that I managed to get out twice this week for 3.1 miles each time. That's 6.2 miles this week. (I've pretty much given up on running at this point-my bod just can't handle the impact anymore.) Also, I was surprised at how sore my butt was after my first walk-guess I'm more out of shape than I realized. The first day I walked was the first day we've seen sun up here in Michigan in quite some time, so I thought "whoo-hoo, I can get out and get some exercise." Wouldn't you know it, it was still only about 40 degrees and it started raining about 3/4 of a mile into my route. So those 3.1 miles should count double for being so sucky! Today was much nicer-sunny and about 50-wopping degrees. I've decided I really need some cold-weather workout gear, so if anyone has any suggestions, send them my way. I'm tired of my legs freezing and turning bright red from the cold.

I hope all the rest of my sisters out there had a great week and good luck to anyone running this weekend.